BOUNDARIES are your FREEDOM – part 1.
Never allow people to hold you at ransom emotionally or mentally.
Definition of RANSOM is a price paid for your freedom. It usually refers to a scenario where a person has been captured by an opposing side in a war and can only be released by the payment of money – or where a person is kidnapped by someone with the aim of getting money in exchange for the release of said person.
Then there is this: being held ransom in our own lives by someone who has captured our peace of mind…and is holding on to it until we act how they want us to.
Yes, we can be held at ransom for our peace of mind and many of us have been. This happens when we only allow ourselves to be free or be at peace, when we have paid the price demanded by someone we have given away our power to.
Sometimes it is big… We are not allowed to enjoy ourselves unless and until that person is included in the fun.
Sometimes we are simply not allowed to be ourselves unless we do what that person wants us to do.
Sometimes our introverted energy is seen as unacceptable to someone who does not understand our need for space and time alone…or vice versa…our extroverted energy is held ransom by someone who can’t understand that we need to be around people to be charged up.
So Many of us are held in captivity because of other people’s emotional baggage. It is not physical but it is all too real. Being emotionally caught up in anyone or any situation means that you can be manipulated. This doesnt necessarily mean that you are in love with them or that you are afraid of them. It doesn’t even mean that you need them in any way. Sometimes it is just your conditioning to always please others… or never displease others.
Being emotionally caught up simply means that you have made their opinion and emotional well-being more important than yours. The very second that you do that, you have crossed into dangerous territory. When you make someone else’s emotional well being and their opinion more important than yours, you have given away precious power. You are courting a disaster. This is not to say it must never be done. That is your business. What i would like to suggest is that you choose wisely which human being is so valuable to you that you are willing to surrender your peace of mind for theirs. And if someone requires that you surrender your peace of mind – what makes them so valuable to you?
Many things in our dealings with others cause us unnecessary emotional pain. And we often spend our entire lives living through various forms of this pain with numerous people – and it makes many people a nervous wreck, juggling expectations of others. We can spend so much time negotiating between pleasing this one and that one that we fail to honour ourselves and even fail to honour our loved ones because we are trying to please people who are really not that important to us (or shouldn’t be).
Whatever the reason you are held at emotional ransom, escape and suffer the consequence if need be. STOP PAYING THE PRICE. The truest emancipation is a happy life with CLEAR BOUNDARIES. Enjoy yourself. MW AH Michael Holgate