On Giving


Understanding your contribution to the world becomes so much clearer when you understand that you can only give who you are. You can only give FROM who you are. You can only give what you have and therefore the converse is true that you can’t give what you don’t have. So if you have not stockpiled enough love and empowerment and peace in your soul you will not be able to give that to the world.

It is the gift of yourself to the world that most enriches you. In fact, every single thing that you give away, from a pin to an anchor; from prayers to money; from promises to performance IS A blessing or a gift to yourself. So, you should know that giving is not just a matter of helping someone else. Giving is a way of blessing yourself.

So does this mean you should give away what you need and leave yourself empty or bankrupt? No. The space from which you give is what is important. The mental space that produces the gift is certainly the true giver. It is not when someone has received something from you that the giving has taken place. That moment in which the thing being given has been released from you into the care or space of another is the true gift. What is that space? If it is a space of fear or not having enough or regret or annoyance or anger… then that is what you have really given, even if a million dollars has left your hands into the care of another. If it is a smile or joy or happiness or peace or support or love, then that is what you have given, multiplied by the million that has been handed over. So give sparingly of your fears but give your positive energy in multiples.

And sometimes the best thing to do is give back to yourself. Sometimes you have given away so much from a space of fear or powerlessness or disempowerment or insecurity, that you need to reclaim your SELF from the multiple spaces in which you have disowned it.

So, taking back your self respect is in fact a gift. Withdrawing a welcome mat from a space that devalued you is in fact a gift. Although it may seem like you have taken away something it is a gift – a gift to yourself and also a gift of understanding to people who need to learn how to value, appreciate and show respect. This might seem disingenuous but it is in keeping with the premise that the real gift is the space from which you give. You cannot stay in a disempowering space, giving to others and being annoyed and hurt and angry and claim to be giving, even if the other person is happy at your expense. There is value in making a sacrifice to give to another. Parents do that all the time. They give to their children and do without what they need – and that is still giving from a space of love. It is not love when your giving makes you question your value or self worth or makes you feel insecure or worthless.

Sometimes the best gift is saying ‘no’ or ‘no more.’ That is a decision we sometimes have to make. You must say ‘no’ to anything that threatens your empowerment. If you don’t, then no matter what you give or who you give to, you haven’t really given a gift- you have stolen something valuable from SELF. And the universe will not stay silent. So when you are experiencing bouts of negative emotion and chaotic energy, check yourself to see where you may have been stealing from SELF, even to seemingly enrich someone else. Remember you can’t give what you don’t have, so if you deplete your self then maybe you are not truly giving what you think you are giving.

Sometimes if you catch yourself giving from a space that is disempowering you need to stop and recalibrate. If you catch yourself giving from a space of lack, you may need to stop and get a hold of yourself then start afresh again when you can truly give from the consciousness of peace, love and prosperity. MW AH Michael Holgate