The Habit of Self Sabotage (Part 4)

Acceptance of self is a magic potion. People don’t know that very often it’s not that others reject you. It’s that you are rejecting yourself and enlisting the aid of others in doing it. The self sabotage mechanism in us thrives on non-acceptance of self. When you find any part of who you are to be ‘not good enough’ it is a signal to your subconscious mind that YOU are not deserving and that YOU must not get enough. YOU must not get the full desires of your heart because if you do, it would violate a core belief that you have which is: “I am not enough.”

Acceptance of self is the most important gift you could ever give to your self. It is a gift you must give to yourself. Without it, you are playing ‘poor me politics’ and that always justifies itself in the end. It will take courage to accept yourself and it must be done- decisively. Challenge yourself. It is the perfect way to derail some of the self defeating and self destructive habits that you have let slide into your life. Go on a mission of self acceptance today. Make it a 40 day plan. Make self acceptance a life goal. Create a self acceptance challenge for yourself. Look at people who seem to have accepted themselves for who they are. Study them. Talk to them. Find out what they are doing differently from others…differently from you. Look at people who for all intents and purposes according to societal rules, should not be accepting themselves and yet they are— why not you? Step into a new world of fearless acceptance of self and see what new you and what new blessings show up. Self acceptance is not an outward act. It is not expected that you will go out on the town telling everyone you meet that you accept yourself… Or tell people that “I never used to accept that part of me but now I do”… no. It’s not about that. It’s personal. Search your own soul for signs and cues of non-acceptance and then change them.

Self acceptance is the planting of a seed. It happens in the dark of the soil that is you. And once planted it stays there gestating. If you nurture it then your self acceptance will grow. It sprouts roots and shoots and eventually bears fruits. Remember you can’t serve God and Mammon- as the bible says. Remember that you can’t Suck air out of a bottle but when you pour water in, the air is no longer there. So.. The trick is not to try to stop your self Sabotage, but to nurture your self acceptance.

MW AH Michael Holgate